dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
