He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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