I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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