..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
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