Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
