i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
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Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize