If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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