ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?