I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Randomize