You're a womanizer and a bitch.
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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