OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
