Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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