? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
