You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize