plz talk dirty to me
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
