Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
