I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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