I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Don't make out with my wife yet
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
