Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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