and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Randomize
