Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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