We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize