New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
my liver is dry heaving
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
