If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Randomize
