Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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