I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize