Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
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