he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
