do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize