I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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