Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize