How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
