So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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