I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize