after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
He's on the porch naked. Help.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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