she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
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