...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
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