My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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