Dual....:-)
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
