i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
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