just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
