Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
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Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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