you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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