I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
