I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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