okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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