what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
I'm passing your future prison.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize