She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize