physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Randomize