Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you just see the Batmobile???
tonight lets celebrate not being married
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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