do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
you had me at cake vodka
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
