Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
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