I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
